Presidential Library Tour

Malphonia is pleased to be kicking off our Fall Presidential Library tour at the Millard Fillmore Presidential Library. Join us on October 13 starting at 8pm for our three-century-spanning repertoire of vaguely familiar tunes and questionable time signatures, featuring a new set of old favorites.

Warren Harding sitting in on Sousaphone

2016 Summer Patio Tour

Summer is in all its glory and so are the fellas of Malphonia, Cleveland’s rock star neutral musical ensemble and leading advocates of the open carry of instruments.

Luckily for our fans, our glory is being shared outside of our own minds and private patio, bringing our musical stylings to several favorite al fresco sites around town.

Sunday, July 3: CHA Spirits and Pizza 4-5PM

Wednesday, July 13: Toast 6-9PM

Sunday, July 24: Pat’s in the Flats 5-9PM (sharing the stage with Jean Brandt and Avril McInally)

Wednesday, August 17: Toast 6-9PM

Looking for that perfect summer band? With a repertoire spanning three centuries, our un-amplified  ensemble of accordion, trumpet, euphonium, tuba, and percussion provides a pleasant accompaniment to your guests. And your guests will appreciate not having to scream over the band. Please contact us for booking and availability.

Rooms to Let: Music for an Installation

For the second year, Rooms To Let Cleveland will be held in Slavic Village, and once again Malphonia is pleased to be part of the installation. Join us Sunday afternoon (5/22/16) as we provide a certain ambiance to the installation. As always, our repertoire will span a range of rock-star neutral™ renderings of old and new favorites, presented with an artful/slavic tinge.

accordion boy

Sitting About Tremont

In the Spring young mens fancy lightly turns to thoughts of love, but for us middle age Malphonians, we think about sitting outside to play our “music”. Such will be the opportunity this May 13th, when the first Walkabout Tremont kicks off in the historic/nostalgic neighborhood of Tremont. Join us between 6 and 9 pm as we play at large in the neighborhood. Just follow the squeezy, honking sounds to the old men with the even older instruments, and mind the valets so you don’t get run over.

accordion boy
Joe plays one of his first busking gigs


Dyngus 2016 with Malphonia

We’re getting our polka chops in shape for one of our favorite holidays; it’s Dyngus Day Cleveland style this March 28. Join us as we kick off the celebrations at Tremont’s Prosperity Social Club from 12-2, or meet us as we take our talents to Detroit-Shoreway’s Toast Wine Bar from 4-7.

In addition to our usual line up of accordion, percussion, trumpet, euphonium, dancing bears, and other musical ephemera, our lineup now features a genuine TUBA!

As always, our repertoire will feature a variety of seasonal tunes about beer, kishka, fair maidens, fresh orange juice, and the blue liquor laws of Heaven, as well as our expanded set list including opera tunes, tin pan alley, South American exotica, a little Kurt Weil, a dash of Michel Legrand, sports themed marches, chicken dances, and sweet love songs.

Members of Malphonia training for Dyngus Day

Tremont Artwalk hosts Malphonia

Cleveland’s longest running artwalk will be the setting for our latest rock-star neutral performance. Set against the until recently affordable neighborhood and soon to burst entertainment bubble on Professor, Malphonia will surely provide a stark contrast to the high rolling, valet-parking, weekend adult playground with their grumpy, un-amplified, centuries spanning repertoire this Friday, August 14, from 6-9PM.

Come down and watch uncomfortable suburbanites try not to make eye contact with the band as they stroll past looking for the latest “eatery” that looks just like a place from another part of the country may have looked at one point in history. Leave early in deadly fear of the sudden rash of car jackings. Squeal in amazement and pity at the people who “actually live here”. 

Note: please don’t talk to the horn player, his mouth is busy. Also, the drum set is NOT a seat, no matter how cute you are. However, comments about how your uncle or grandpa used to play accordion are always welcome.

the oldest commercial structure in Tremont (it’s hard to see because it was torn down last week)

Gramps Before Amps

Fresh off of our Cleveland World Fest gig, where we were charged with no less a task than inaugurating the Scene Busker Stage,™ Malphonia will return to their sometimes summer home of CHA Pizza and Spirits this Wednesday, August 5th. Located in Battery Park, so named for the naturally occurring battery runoff found in the native soil, Malphonia will be sharing the patio with our comrades in music, Duo Decibel System.

Duo Decibel has graciously conceded the order of performance to Malphonia, adhering to the old tradition of “Gramps before Amps.” So join us first up at 6PM for an un-amplified set of trans-century ditties, immediately followed by the Duo of Decibels.

goes to market
goes to eleven